


Two Guys in the Woods

by Blue_Lacquer



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Gen, Humor, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, POV Minor Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-03
Updated: 2015-04-03
Packaged: 2018-03-21 01:57:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3673230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Lacquer/pseuds/Blue_Lacquer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chong and Moku tell Lily about meeting two strange guys in the woods.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Two Guys in the Woods

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for [](http://story-lottery.livejournal.com/profile)[story_lottery](http://story-lottery.livejournal.com/) and published on livejournal.

Chong hugged and kissed his wife and said, "It's good to have you back, Flower Girl." He let go of her, and they sat down by the campfire next to Moku, who was stirring the night's dinner in a pot. "How's your mom?"

Lily answered, "She's good. You should come with me and see her next time, Chong. She doesn't bite. Well, there was that one guy in the market, but that was years ago, and he tried to steal her purse."

Chong rubbed the back of his neck. "Oh, babe, you know me and your mom just don't dig each other."

Lily looked around. "Weren't there two other people traveling with us?"

"Oh, them. They stayed in the last town, the one next to the hot springs. Said the steam opened the thought chakra."

"Does it?"

"It just gave me a rash."

"What were their names anyway?"

Chong thought for a moment. "You know, I'm not sure they told me."

Lily put an arm around her husband. "What have you two been up to while I've been away?"

"Oh, you know, baby. Playing music, going where the road takes us."

Moku closed the lid over the pot and sat back down. He said, "Tell her about those two guys in the woods the other day."

Chong laughed. "Those guys! Yeah, we met these two totally crazy guys in the woods."

"The old guy was kind of groovy," Moku said. "But the other guy was like..." Moku screwed up his face, and made clawing motions with hooked fingers, "RAAAAAR!"

"You're getting ahead of the story, man," Chong said.

"Sorry. But he was _intense_."

Lily asked, "Should I get the pipes?"

"Yeah, yeah, get the pipes. And I'll tell you about the crazy guys."  
  
The pipes were lit, and the three of them smoked in silence for a few minutes. Chong said, lying down and stretching out, "This is the prettiest spot we've camped in for a while, man. All this grass, and all these flowers. There's nothing like a spring meadow. It makes you feel like a bud, ready to burst open with all kinds of colors and smells and stuff. And pollen, man. The bees'll come and crawl all over you, and take off and crawl all over somebody else, and you get new flowers. Circle of life, my friends, circle of life."

Moku shuddered and said, "Will you stop talking about bees crawling on people?"

"Circle of life, man."

Lily blew a smoke ring, and asked, "So what's this about two crazy guys?"

Chong sat back up and said, "Right, I was going to tell you about that. OK, so, we're walking through this forest, and it's all green and flowery and full of, like, spring, and we're feeling good, 'cause, hey, new life all around us, man. We're singing, I'm strumming and Moku is drumming and, well, obviously you weren't there so you weren't playing with us. Then we hear this voice singing along! I'm like, 'Whoa! Spirits!' And we don't know if it's a good spirit who just wants to jam, or a bad spirit who wants to kidnap us and make us do all the spirit's housework, like in the stories."

"But it wasn't a spirit," Moku said. "It was just a fat guy."

"I'm trying to set the mood, Moku! I'm trying to give Lily an idea of what it was like to be there, you know. It was spooky, for a like a minute, with just this voice in the woods and you don't know who's singing."

"Sorry, Chong."

"But, yeah, it was a fat guy, not a spirit." Chong paused, scratching his chin. "What did he say his name was?"

"Mushi."

"Right. We could tell right away that Mushi was a little weird. He was a little wild eyed, and he had a leaf in his beard. And it wasn't like, part of his look, you know, like he's this super nature guy who weaves leaves in his beard to be closer to the trees."

"Weaves leaves," Lily said, giggling.

Chong continued, "It was like a leaf got stuck there and he just didn't notice. I mean, you can tell the difference."

Moku said, "I think he has family problems, poor guy. Can you imagine living in a cave in the woods with no food and that nephew of his?"

"We haven't gotten to that part yet!"

"I'm just saying, I'd be stressed too."

"Anyway," Chong said, "we start talking to the guy, because he seems lonely, and, hey, you have to reach out to your fellow people, even if they're strange."

"Sing it!" Lily cried.

Moku beat his drum and Chong crooned, "People! Reach out to peo---ple!"

"Woo!" Lily yelled.  
  
Everyone laughed, and Chong went on. "We're talking, and it's pretty good, all about music and tea and, like, life, and he says that it's going to start raining soon, so we can come back to his cave if we want and stay dry."

"That was nice," Lily said.

"Yeah. He was the nice crazy guy. So we go back to his cave with him, and I think he'd just moved in because he didn't have any furniture, or food, like Moku said. I didn't ask him about it, because I don't want to be a nosy nomad, you know? But we had plenty of food, so we shared and he got super excited when I said we had jasmine tea."

"Yeah," Moku said, "he jumped up and almost hit his head on the ceiling."

"Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. That was pretty funny." Chong slapped his knee. "But he was right--it started raining. So, we're all just hanging out in his cave, and since he's a groovy guy, but kind of stressed out, we offer him a pipe. And he's like, 'I haven't smoked a pipe since I was a young, skinny man--if you can believe I was once skinny.'"

"He's a pretty big guy," Moku said.

"Yeah, he was. But he knew a lot of songs, and after lunch we're smoking and jamming and having fun. And then... _then_..."

"His nephew showed up."

"That was a dramatic pause!"

"I thought you forgot what happened."

Chong sighed. "His nephew, Lo..."

"Li," Moku said.

"Really? I thought it was Lo."

"No, it was Li."

"Anyway, his nephew shows up at the cave, all soaking wet and," Chong made a glowering face, which made Lily laugh, "capital A Angry. He's like, scary looking. He's bald! No hair at all!"

"And he has a big scar," Moku added.

"Right! The scar. It was like an armadillo bear tried to eat the side of his head. He comes in, and we stop playing, 'cause the love vibe was just gone. Just whoosh, the balloon popped."

"He had a lot of negative energy," Moku agreed.

"Exactly! I mean, I'd be unhappy if I was bald at his age, too, but I'd try not to take it out on everybody else. But, we just all look at each other for a minute. Mushi looks like, 'Oh, crap,' because he knows what's coming. And then Angry Guy starts yelling." Chong stood up, waving his arms, and growled. "UNCLE! WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE? WHAT ARE THEY DOING HERE? WHAT IS THAT STINK?"

Lily giggled. Moku said, "Chong, you just can't do the voice."

"Yeah, he had this really raspy voice."

Moku warbled, sounding like he was being half strangled, "It was more like this."

"Oh, you can't do it either, Moku. Anyway, we're all eyeing the cave door, wondering if we should make a run for it. And Mushi's like, 'Oh, don't mind my nephew,' and 'Nephew, these are our guests, and they have kindly shared their tea with us, so please do not shout and say they smell.' And the nephew's all 'GRRR ARG!'"

Chong thrashed his arms around, then fell down on the soft grass. Lily and Moku laughed and clapped, and Chong kicked his legs in the air. He sat back up and continued, "Eventually, he stomped off to the back of the cave to, like, brood or whittle or something."

Moku added, "And he kept yelling 'PEASANTS!'"

"Oh, yeah! What was that about? We're _nomads_. And you live in a cave, dude. You can't talk."

Lily said, "I'm sorry I missed it. Sounds like a trip."

"Oh, it totally was," Chong said. "We hung out for a little while after the drama-rama, but when the rain cleared up we split. Too many negative vibes."

"We left Mushi some food," Moku said. "I mean, really, I felt for him, man."

Chong picked up his guitar and strummed. "He'll be ok. Things work out in the end, you know? They always do for us." Moku and Lily murmured agreement. Chong sniffed the air. "Hey, is dinner done yet? Cause I'm starving."  
  



End file.
